Finding Love From Within
by Sesshoumarulover111
Summary: On Hold for now... Kag/Sess Kagome and Inuyasha make an agreement about their love but what happens when Inuyasha doesn't hold up his end of the bargin? And why does Sesshoumaru want to join their group? Rated M for later chapters


_**Author's Note: okay people this is my first fanfic so please be nice. I started one before but then I deleted it because I didn't like where it was going. I love the idea of Kagome and Sesshoumaru as a couple (although I wish it was me lol). Anyways I hope you enjoy the story.**_

_I do not own Inuyasha or any of the characters belonging to the series. All of the character belong to _Rumiko Takahashi.

Chapter 1

'_I keep wondering why I'm still here. What keeps me trapped in this sick and twisted hell hole he calls a relationship. If he loves me, why does he treat me this way? It's like I mean nothing to him.'_

"Kagome!!"

'_Why doesn't he just leave me alone?'_

"Kagome!! Ka…Gom.ee!!"

'_I hope he doesn't find me this time.' _I thought knowing deep down that it was only a matter of time before his nose picked up my scent.

"Kagome where are you?!" I heard him shout. He sounded angry this time. _'Great Kagome now you got him mad. "Why doesn't he just leave me alone?" _I whispered from my spot behind a wide berry bush. As if my words had conjured him he leapt from behind the bushes blocked my view of the forest I was about to dash to with bright red.

" Hey wench, why were you hiding?!" he shouted.

I stared at him angry as hell. He seemed to flinch.

"I was not hiding Inuyasha I fell!" I shouted back pointing to my injured ankle. I heard him winch softly then he stood up suddenly surprising me.

"Leave it to you to always get hurt." He said not looking at me. He begins to walk away from me then shouted over his shoulder, "hurry up a get back to camp or you'll be sleeping out here tonight."

I glared at him retreating back praying that I had enough strength to reach the large rock a few feet away from me so I could throw it at him. "I cannot move on my own Inuyasha! Now either you get your butt over here and help me or I'll sit you so much you won't be able to walk for months!"

He stopped walking and I could hear he begin to growl. Then he turned swiftly in my direction and begin running towards me. "Hey Inuyasha I was jus jo…." I managed to say throwing me hand up defensively then I saw him leap over me to the other side of the bushes. I peeped through the leaves wondering if he had gone mad because he seemed to be growling at the trees. "Inuyasha um…is everything okay?" I asked warily.

When he did not respond I became frightened. "Inuyasha you're scaring me what is it?" Still no response from him and that was when I felt it. I strong demonic aura coming from the direction he was growling at. Then through the leaves I saw a white figure emerged from the trees. "Sesshoumaru" I whispered wide-eyed.

"Sesshoumaru! What are you doing here?" I heard Inuyasha asked along with the sound of tetsusaiga being drawn. I watched as the demon lord ignored Inuyasha completely and continued walking on as if he did not exist. Inuyasha looking angered by the fact that he was being ignored and jumped in front of Sesshoumaru showing his fangs.

'Is_ he trying to get himself killed?'_ I asked myself.

"Move" I heard Sesshoumaru spoke in a demanding tone sending chills down my spine.

"Not until you tell me what you're doing hear!"

"My business is not your concern little brother." Sesshoumaru said is a calm yet noticeable annoyed tone. "Now remove yourself out of my way or I will do it for you"

"I will like to see you try!" Inuyasha said taking an offensive stance.

"He doesn't mean that!" I shouted from my hiding spot. _'Great now he going to kill me too.'_

When I didn't hear a response I peeped through the bushes once again and saw the two brother just standing there staring at one another. Inuyasha looked angry and Sesshoumaru looked bored. Then I saw Sesshoumaru begin walking again around Inuyasha. I stared at the scene shocked. _'They did not fight! Sesshoumaru must be in a generous mood to have let Inuyasha live and not even injure him at all.'_

"Hey don't walk away from me you bastard!" Inuyasha screamed at his back.

Sesshoumaru paused for a moment then continued walking. "You should be careful how you use your word little brother. Father and my mother where mated when I was conceived. It was your whore of a mother who slept with father unmated and had you as a result" With that said he disappeared into the forest leaving a very angry Inuyasha behind.

I few moments later after he seemed to recover from the blow to his pride he received from his elder brother, Inuyasha began walking in the direction of camp.

"Hey don't you leave me here!"

"Get yourself up!"

"Inuyasha!" I shouted and he seemed to know what was coming next because he dashed toward me."Sit boy!" I shouted and watch as his rosary lit up and he landed face first on the stone I wanted to throw at his back. _'That'll work' _I said smirking as I heard him swearing from his crater in the ground. When the spell wore off he got up with a mouth filled with dirt and the outline of the rock on his face.

"Ha ha ha…." I laughed holding me stomach and pointing at him.

"What the hell are you laughing at?"

"You...hahaha...that look on you face, hahaha…it's priceless."

"keh" he said looking away from me pouting and sitting in his signature Indian style position.

"Come on Inuyasha you have to admit it was pretty funny."

"Hump" he said folding his arms tighter.

"Oh okay I'm sorry for laughing at you Inuyasha. Now can you please carry me back to the village?" I said giving him the biggest puppy eyes I could make even trembling my lip to add an extra effect. He looked at me looking like he was trying to decide between leaving me there and taking me and I glared at him."I will say it again." He picked me up quickly bridal style and we were headed toward the village.

Looking up at his face I could tell he was thinking about the event just happened. Everything Inuyasha came in contact with his brother he would always look sad afterward. I use to think it was because of the things he said to him but now, I believe it's something more. _'I think what he really wants it to just be accepted by his big brother. I don't understand why they can just get along they're family! Sesshoumaru is such a jerk! But…after today I think he actually has a good side. Haha, right this is Sesshoumaru you're talking about Kagome he has know good side." _ Resting my head on his chest I continued thinking. _'He might thought, I mean I never thought I could get over Inuyasha and here I am in his arm and I have yet to blush. It's probably because I gave up on trying to get him to see me as me and not Kikiyo a long time ago. Thinking about it now doesn't even make me sad anymore. I don't know what I was thinking trying to get him to forget about Kikiyo!? I had a better chance of getting Sesshoumaru to mate me, a human. Maybe I should try. He is kinda cute. Who am I kidding that man is gorgeous no beautiful! And his hair looks so soft and shiny I wonder how it feels. Wait what am I saying?' _I thought to myself. _This is Sesshoumaru I'm talking about. The Lord of the Western lands mister I hate humans, a very powerful demon who has tried to kill me on more that one occasion. Why am I thinking about HIM this way?'_

"_Oi, what are you all red about?" I heard Inuyasha ask me_

"_Nothing" I replied quickly and was happy when he only looked at me with a raised eyebrow and continued walking mumbling something about girls and their stupid emotions._

_When we got back to camp it was dark and everyone else was already asleep. I was happy because I was not interested in answering any of Sango's questions about why I was injured. I was happy Inuyasha had not asked me how I fell. I got sad thinking about how I got my ankle earlier today injured._

_Flashback_

"_I'm glad that's over." I said resting my school bag on my bed. I had just taken my final exam for college and I would get the results in a couple of weeks. It would not have taken me so long to get a degree if I was not travelling between my time and 500 years in the past. If I had a normal life I would have gotten a degree at 21 like my other friend who were in the advanced class like I was instead of at 23._

_I sat at my desk opening the top draw. I saw the scrapbook that I made of my and all of my friends from high school as well as my friends from the past. There was a picture of Inuyasha holding his tongue under the faucet after I begged him to taste my mother curry a second time and a picture of Inuyasha sneaking up behind Shippo while he was eating he breakfast. Across from it was a picture of him in a crater with Sango giggling with her hand covering her mouth and Miroku with his eyes closed calmly eating his breakfast and Shippo looked lost. I turned the page and I saw I picture of me with Hojo looking helpless and confused and two of my closest friends in the background looking at us starry-eyed. I laughed. My friends were always getting me to go on dates with that guy even when I didn't want to go. I could never be a normal girl, well woman now. I wouldn't trade my life for anyone else's._

_I sighed and stretched in my seat. After a few more minutes of flipping through my scrapbook I took a bathe and was headed downstairs. I met my younger brother downstairs watching TV in the family room. Though he was now I teenager I still called him little brother at times instead of calling him by him name which he hated. My mother wasn't at home; she was working late again so I decided to make something for Souta and me to eat._

_After a little eating and catching up with Souta I headed to bed. It was still weird for me to listen to him talk about girls in his school that he liked. I missed so much. Crawling under my covers I fell asleep almost instantly. I woke up the next morning feeling energized. I stayed in bed for a while enjoying the feeling of my mattress under me, I luxury I did not have 500 years in the past. I turned my head __and saw the time and I realized I was late. "Oh my Gosh Inuyasha going to kill me!" I rushed in the shower and was out in record time. _

_After I was dressed I grabbed my bag that I had packed before I went to take me exam and headed for the well house. When I got there I remembered that I left some feminine supplies in the bathroom that Sango asked me to bring back for her. I left me backpack in the well house and rushed back to get the supplies before Inuyasha came to get me knowing that I would move faster it I didn't have such a heavy load to carry around. It took me about five minutes to get to the house, go upstairs, gather everything she asked for and get back downstairs. When I got down the stairs I heard the front door slam and I froze. I know my mother wasn't home front work already and Souta was already at school so it could only be my mother boyfriend Hitaru. _

_As he got closer to the stairs I could smell the scent of rum and smoke saying that he spent the entire night at the bar with his friends drinking and he was drunk. I hate when he was drunk! He was a nice guy when he was sober. He cared for my brother and took care of my mother and was a perfect gentleman. But when he got drunk, which was only when me mother was not around, he transformed into a completely different person. I swore as he__ stopped in front of me as I stood at the foot of the stairs._

"_Sweetie is that you?" he asked staggering toward me. "You're home early and looking younger than ever." When he got in front of me he threw his arms around me and he face was inches away from mine. "You are so beautiful." He said and the scent of his breath made me almost want to throw up. Then he squeezed my butt causing my eyes to widen. Before I knew what I was doing I saw my hand print planted on the left side of his face and I covered my mouth in shock. He stared at me looking very angry and very serious__. He took a step toward me and I ran pass him out of the door._

"_Kagome you little slut get back here!" he shouted chasing me. I ran as fast as I could toward the well knowing that if I got inside before he got me there was no way he could hurt me. I ran and I could feel him staring my down. I could hear the sound of his feet loudly over mine pounding on the stone of the shrine grounds and it was a fast beat. I knew if I did not try hard he was going to catch me and in his state I did not know what he would do to me. I pulled the extra supplies closer to my body and ran faster praying that I would some how make it to the well house before he caught up to me. I got to the door and I ran inside closing. I looked around quickly trying to remember where I placed my bag and saw it in the corner of the well house. I ran to get it and when I turn to dive into the well there he was standing between me and my safety trying to refill his lungs with the air he lost trying to catch up to me. I was terrified. He looked even angrier. 'Maybe I can still make it if I jump past him' I thought looking at the well. He seemed to what I was thinking knowing that I travelled through time using the well. I decided that it was my only option. I could either stay there and wait for him to charge at me or, risk diving into the well but if I missed I would end up in his arms and it would be the same end. Still, I don't think I would be able to live with myself if I didn't try. _

_With my backpack already on my back and the extra supplies in my hand I ran toward him and dived toward the opening of the well. When it seemed like I would make it I felt his hands on my foot but because I was already almost all the way inside the well my foot slipped through his hand but my ankle hit the edge of the well I screamed and was almost immediately surrounded by a blue light that indicating the magic of the well._

_I hit the bottom of the well 500 years in the past and all of the supplies I held in my hand scattered. I moved to gather them and was instantly stunned but a shocking pain that seemed to travel from my ankle to my spine. I looked down at my ankle and saw that it was swollen and was already starting to turn purple. I touched it softly and winched as I was again assaulted with the same shocking pain. It took me a while to gather all the supplies then climb out of the well without the use of one of my legs. When I got out I was surprised to not be greeted by a grumpy half-demon. 'He's probably with Kikiyo somewhere.' I concluded and started hoping toward Kaede__'s village. I didn't know how far I'd hopped but I got tired and it felt liked the village was to far away. I stopped by a berry bushed and decided to wait for Inuyasha to pick up my scent and come and get me. And if he didn't I had nice ripe berries to eat if I got hungry._

'_Inuyasha always saves me.' I thought but this time I wasn't happy about it. 'I guess that why he could never love me. That's why he could never have fell in love with me. I was…no I am a burden to him. He could have never cared about me the way I care about him. I was too weak. I am too weak.' I sighed 'No I cannot think like this. Those days are gone when I felt sorry for myself because Inuyasha doesn't love me. I__'m not a little girl anymore. I can't compare myself to Kikiyo, because I'm better than her!' as I said deep down I didn't believe it. _

'_I don't know why I made that stupid agreement with him anyway! I just couldn't turn him down then. He seemed so__...so desperate._

_Flashback FLASHBACK_

"_Kagome please don't leave please I'd do anything." He said staring at me holding my hand trying to stop me from entering the well._

"_No Inuyasha! I can't take it anymore I can't do this anymore! You made it very clear that it's KIKIYO that you want to me with and not ME!' I screamed tears running down my cheeks. "How could you? You told me you love me and then I find you with her? Telling her that same thing how could you?"_

"_Kagome please you don't understand it's not like that! Kikiyo means nothing to me it's you I love!" I screamed back pulling me to him. "Please don't leave me please Kagome I'd d anything just please…don't leave me." He whispered in my ear._

_I couldn't leave him. He sounded so needy, so desperate. It was the first time and had ever heard Inuyasha so open with his feelings. But if I would stay I need to be sure. "I don't know stay Inuyasha. You've hurt me so much so much times and I don't know if I can trust you. You love Kikiyo and…I'm not Kikiyo."_

"_No Kagome, don't say that. I love you." He whispered again hugging me tighter as if he was emphasizing his feelings. "I know lets make a deal okay?" leaning back so he could look at my face. "I won't see or speak to Kikiyo again and in return you stay with me. You don't have to become my mate right away just treat me like I'm your mate and I'll treat you like you're my mate and if you're happy with it..we'll be mated." He said the last part with a blush. "But only when you're ready." He added._

_I stood there looking at his hopeful face. I didn't trust him completely with my heart but I trusted him with my life. And I couldn't turn him down. This was Inuyasha. The on__e who has saved my life so many times and as much as I hate to admit it I'm still in love with him. "I'm not to sure about this but, alright Inuyasha." He smiled and I felt like I'd made the right decision._

_END Flashback FLASHBACK_

_That happened two months ago.__ I don't know how long I'd being there thinking about that day but I felt him coming toward me before I heard him. Then I started to think about the decision I made back then. Nothing really changed. In fact things got worst and he lied more so he could go and see her but I knew the truth, he loved Kikiyo and he would never love me. I had already made up my mind a while back when I realized that he would never feel the same way he would about me. Besides I'm not a child anymore I deserve better._

_END Flashback_

When I woke up the next morning everyone else was still asleep. I was happy because it would be quiet and I would be able to think. _'I have to tell Inuyasha a bout my decision today' _I thought. I lay there for a while and I felt everyone begin to stir. If I was not injured I would have made breakfast but my ankle made it hard for me to move around.

"Lady Kagome I see you're back. Are you well?" Miroku asked me with a bright smile.

"I'm fine Miroku thank you." I replied returning the smile.

"Kagome" I heard Sango say with alarm. Obviously she noticed my ankle. "What happen to your ankle?"

"It's nothing Sango," I said with I smile brushing it off "it will heal in no time."

"Nonscence, I'm going to take care of this!" she announced and headed for my big backpack. After searching through it she came back with my first aid kit. She took out the bandages and went to wrap my ankle.

"Wait, Inuyasha could you take me to the spring please I'd like to take a bath." I heard grumbling then he jump down from he perch in the tree and picked my up and carried me to the hot spring nearby. "Inuyasha" I called when he was about to leave. "Can I talk to you for a minute?"

He stopped and turned around nodding his head. He stood there staring at me for a while and I stared at him from my seat on a large smooth bolder where he had placed me. The wind blew between us making his rough looking grayish white hair sway like the grass between us. He looked at me with worry in his eyes. Probably because he had no idea what I wanted to say to him and he could probably smell my sadness.

"Inuyasha..."

"Kagome, before you begin I want to say that I'm sorry for the way I acted when I found you yesterday." He said looking away from me.

"It's okay."

"And I'm sorry I've wasn't treating you so well lately. I wasn't really being and good example of a mate."

"About that Inuyasha, I don't think we should continue this." He turned his head toward me.

"What do you mean?"

"Our agreement, I don't think we should continue this."

"But Kagome..."

"No buts Inuyasha."

"But I lov…"

"I know about her" I said cutting him off and looking down at my feet.

"I know that you were going to her when I went to sleep."

"I know you love her Inuyasha. I won't keep you from her any longer. You don't love me. You think you love me Inuyasha but you don't."

"Kagome I…"

"Let just be friends okay?" I said looking up at him and smiling

He looked at me with hurt in his eyes but I could also see understanding. He nodded his head.

"Good." I said softly knowing he could hear me. "Go to her, besides I he a bath to take!" I said cheerfully. And his face turned red. Then I was overwhelmed by a powerful demonic aura. Then I heard Inuyasha growl.

Then I watched as Sesshoumaru came and stood in front of Inuyasha.

"Having trouble controlling your woman Inuyasha?" Sesshoumaru asked and I instantly knew that he was just saying it to make him angry.

"What do you want Sesshoumaru?" Inuyasha asked drawing his sword.

"I did not come to fight with you little brother. I have come to announce that I will be travelling with your group from now on."

"Like hell you will! You're not welcomed."

"Inuyasha!" I shouted "That's rude."

"Rude! This is Sesshoumaru we're talking about he is an emotionless ruthless killer. He is travelling with us!"

"We could at least find out why he wishes to travel with us. Lord Sesshoumaru," I said turning to look at him. "Why is it that you want t travel with us?"

He raised and eyebrow at my question then said. "At least this human is smart enough to notice her superior however, why I wish to travel with your disgusting group is of no concern to you. I am not obligated to answer any questions especially not on from a filthy human woman as yourself." He responded in a calm tone and turned a walked back where he came from.

To say I was angry was an understatement. The nerve of the demon! Here I am standing up for him and he calls me filthy. 'Stupid arrogant bastard!'

After Sesshoumaru left, Inuyasha insisted on waiting with me with me until I finished my bath claiming that Sesshoumaru could come back. I would have preferred him to come back rather than wait take a bath with Inuyasha there. He complained the entire time and told me I was taking to long so I was not able to enjoy my bath.

When we got back to camp everything seemed normal and there was no sign of Sesshoumaru. As if my thoughts had conjured him he came walking out of the forest into the village. Miroku was the first to go to an offensive stance followed by Sango. Kirara transformed into her larger form and Shippo bounced over to me. He was to big the jump in my arms so he just hid behind my good leg. They stared at Sesshoumaru for a while seemed to notice that Inuyasha didn't draw his sword.

"Inuyasha?" Sango asked looking worried.

"feh" was all he said as he walked pass them not even looking at his brother. Then hopped in his normal perch in a tree.

"Kagome?"Sango repeated looking confused.

"Hehehe well uhh...hehehe guys Sesshoumaru's kinda going to be travelling with us now." I said scratching the back of my head.

"WHAT!?" Sango and Miroku screamed in unison.

"feh" I heard Inuyasha say from in the tree staring at his brother.

"Hn" Sesshoumaru say looking up at Inuyasha not blinking.

They both look like they wanted to kill each other.

'This is going to be great' I thought

A/N:Okay first chapter is up I hope you enjoyed it. Please review

Sesshoumarulover111


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